I have found myself lately pondering the fact that in a few short months I will turn 50. I have never really let age bother me as I have always had the thought we are as old as we feel. I usually say 29. Maybe I am pondering it more now as this year has brought many changes such as the loss of my father-in-law, my twins turning 19 and graduating, going to college, empty nest, and then 50. The words half a century have twittered in my mind.
I have found there are some things I wouldn’t want to go back to from my younger years. I am wiser than in my younger years, although each year was a stepping stone to where I am now in the journey. I began to wonder what is my purpose now? The things I have been doing for the past 20 years are not what I will be doing in a few short months. Being a mom is something I will always be, but differently now. I am a teacher and passionate about it, but I know there is more to my journey than my career. So what does God have for me in the horizon?
I have realized when my doctor recently told me that I am healthy, but there are changes I need to make to continue to be healthy. Let us just say losing 15 pounds is not my goal, 5 yes. She was ok with that. I am not overweight, but a little slim down would be good for my health. So the walking I have taken up has been good. It is there in those walks I have realized that turning 50 bothers me a just a bit. God might ask me to get out of my comfort zone. Will I have the courage to leap? What does my next stepping stone look like?
While all of these reflections have been good for my heart and soul, I realize living in the moment never stays the same. It is like a revolving door. We can’t go back, just like I can’t be 29 again, so we go through the next door. I am not sure what adventure lies ahead for me. But I know God will take my hand and guide me through the door. Living in the moments I wouldn’t trade for the world and adding more treasure like seashells on a beach. Who knows I may decide 50 is the best age yet!!!! A new step in a journey that has always been one adventure after another.
Blessings on your day,